Robert's World

2006-02-28T15:27:00.000-08:00

Moving My Blog To MySpace.com

Overall, I think MySpace.com is a far superior blog to Blogger.com. So, I've moved my blog to http://www.myspace.com/zeroggunner

2006-02-21T10:02:00.000-08:00

Web News: South Korean gamers stage online massacre of Chinese

As a gamer, I find this conflict quite amusing. To me, violence inside video games is far better, safer, and funnier than violence in the real world. However, I'm sure the news media will (as always) take this way out of context and make it about something it's not. I'm dismayed when I hear ignorant parents and religious nutjobs spouting untruths about how video games are hurting our society, hurting our children by teaching them that violence is ok, yada yada. I feel that the news media is largely responsible for propagating such fear and untruths, and for egregiously over-exaggerating "how bad" the world really is.

From my own experience, gamers are some of the nicest, most non-violent, down-to-earth people one could ever have the pleasure of knowing. They've learned to take real world aggressions and channel them into something completely harmless (beating the virtual crap out of monsters, fragging their friends, etc). The fact that the Chinese & Koreans are airing out their racial tensions online is a glorious thing IMHO. Far better that, than the alternative. Now, if we could just teach Arabs & Muslims how to play some video games... oh, what a better world we could make!

2006-02-13T10:43:00.000-08:00

Activity Report: Sore From Bowling.

My wife Brenda and I went bowling with our friend Josh for a couple hours last night... and now I'm really sore from hurling that 16lb. ball all night. It was one of those rock n' bowl specials where you get to play for 3 hours for $10 each (including shoes, which was a f%$#ing awesome deal) and there's a DJ playin' some tunes with laser lights everywhere. It was pretty cool.

However, we all agreed that the DJ must have been schizophrenic or something... he was blasting out the speakers with some rap/hip-hop crap to start off with, then he switched to heavy/death metal, then to some honky-tonky country crap, then back to rap, etc, etc. There was no happy medium! Out of the whole couple hours, he only played like 2-3 good songs. But, it was still a really fun experience and we'll definitely be going again.

2006-02-08T11:25:00.001-08:00

Movie Review: Fun with Dick and Jane (Dec. 28th, 2005)

Jim Carrey and Téa Leoni make a great pair in this movie. It’s almost like Yin and Yang… Jim’s extraverted and boisterous comedy style is balanced out by Téa’s inverted and subtle comedic style. Having lost his high-paying job at Globodyne (this movie’s Enron), he and all the other employees get screwed out of their pensions and wind up on the verge of bankruptcy. He and his wife sell everything they can to help pay the bills while they’re both looking for jobs, but the job market is scarce and they don’t have much luck. After they hit rock bottom and are on the verge of having to live on the streets, he has a moment of clarity… “We played by the rules and we got SCREWED!”

After that, he puts on his best Unibomber-esque outfit, grabs his son’s toy gun (looks real enough) and concocts a plan to get everything back that was taken from them. I must say, the capers that these two pull are really quite entertaining. What I found most intriguing, however, was the sweetness of love that these two people had for each other… they were more well adjusted than most of the couples I know in real life. It gave the movie almost a wholesome feel and really engrossed the audience and made us all root for them in their endeavors. By the time the movie was over, I’d had some great laughs, but more than that, I really enjoyed the depth and warmth of these characters… that’s a rare quality in movies these days. They really were good people who just got screwed, so they did something about it and ended up helping a lot of people (but I won't spoil the ending). Go watch it for yourself :-)

All in all, I’d give this movie 3.5 STARS. Re-watch value: Medium

2006-02-08T11:25:00.000-08:00

Movie Review: King Kong (Dec. 15th, 2005)

I was so hyped up about going to see this movie, but that hype turned into total boredom after the movie started. This 3-hour train-wreck was a complete waist of time and money. The CGI of Kong was top-notch and Naomi Watts was stunning... but that's about it. The character development, plot and dialogue were all sorely lacking.

Other than Naomi Watts (who played the part exceptionally well), I think the other main roles were terribly miscast. Jack Black sucked and Adrian Brody had very little chemistry with Naomi Watts. Personally, I think Kong out-acted Jack and Adrian... which is sad considering he's not real. As for the rest of the cast... they were just cannon fodder for the movie's ridiculously over-extended action sequences and stupid plot devices (which really detracted from the main story, by the way).

Overall, I really felt like this was 3 totally separate movies, not one...

The 1st hour was tremendously droll and boring. It was basically a movie about a lame-ass movie producer who's about to lose it all, so he decides to pack up and leave town... lying to everyone he can in the process and doing whatever it takes to get his own way.

The 2nd hour was simply a rehash of 1993's Jurassic Park. The sad thing is that the effects in Jurassic Park were FAR BETTER than in King Kong. How can that be? Anyway, the plot devices and action sequences during this hour were hugely over-done, outrageously ridiculous, and riddled with plot holes. The biggest plot hole was... after the ship's captain loses 90% of his crew in trying to save Naomi and capture Kong... how does the <10 remaining people manage to haul Kong onto their ship, secure him, gather enough food for Kong for the journey back to NY, and keep him sedated the whole time? The ship that they came there on was not all that big, nor did they have the man-power left to do much of anything. So of course, the movie completely skips right over this plot hole, going directly from them knocking Kong out with Chloroform to them being back in NY with Kong in chains. Lame!

The 3rd hour was the official Kong movie. He's held captive, breaks free, goes on a wild rampage thru NY, ends up on top of the Empire State Building and then gets shot to death by airplanes with machine guns. During the whole time, there's barely more than a couple lines of dialogue. Most of the movie, in fact, consists of nothing but close-ups of Naomi, Kong, and the rest of the cast. Who needs dialogue or a strong plot when you can just do character close-ups for 3 @#$%ing hours?! Right Peter Jackson?!! You dipshit!!!

Towards the end of the movie, I felt myself wishing the stupid ape would just slip and fall to his death so we could get this train-wreck over with, so we could all go home. Seriously people... don't believe the hype on this movie. I think the "critics" were getting something under-the-table to write such positive reviews. Don't waist your money on this movie.

All in all, I’d give this movie 2 STARS. Re-watch value: None

2006-02-08T11:24:00.001-08:00

Movie Review: Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire (Dec. 8th, 2005)

Honestly, I'm not a huge Harry Potter fan (and no, I've never read the books). I did enjoy watching the first three movies, but my biggest problem with them was that they were too geared towards a child audience. Everything always seemed to just fall into Harry's lap and regardless of how magically incompetent Harry was, everything just seemed to work out in his favor every time he got into trouble.

Unlike the first three movies however, this one was very, very dark... and much more attuned to a mature audience. Lord Voldemort comes back and he's pissed. His minions are gathering and manage to set up an elaborate trap to kidnap Harry Potter and use him as the final piece in their dark ritual to bring Lord Voldemort back to full power.
This movie IMHO had a lot more to offer than the other three.

Examples...

** The dark ritual was very cool... the minion cuts off his hand and drops it into a cauldron, and then he walks over to an ensnared and immobile Harry Potter and stabs him right in the ribs, covering his dagger in blood, which he'll then drip into the cauldron to complete the ritual.

** Harry's friend dies horrifically before his eyes and Harry himself is only moments away from death at the hands of Lord Voldemort and his minions, but as usual, he finds a way to make it out alive.

** I really loved the dragon fight scene... very intense and darkly suspenceful. I was so hoping to see him chomp into Harry, but alas I wasn't that lucky. He got damn close though!

** Lasty, Hermione has grown quite a bit since the last three movies. She's filling out quite nicely and turning into a little hottie. There's one scene where she dresses up in a pretty blue gown for the dance... very hot. Give her a few more years and she could be one of Hollywood's A-List hottest women.

All in all, I’d give this movie 3.5 STARS. Re-watch value: MEDIUM

2006-02-08T11:24:00.000-08:00

Movie Review: The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe (Dec. 13th, 2005)

Wow! This movie was exceptional. The characters were exceedingly detailed and the world of Narnia was rich and magical. For casting so many unknown actors, they did a fabulous job. The young Lucy Pevensie (played by Georgie Henley, who up to this point was completely unknown) stole this movie. She acted her little heart out and really brought a warmth and sweetness to this film.

The opening scene was really dark, ominous and very gripping... a whole squadron of German aircraft are flying over the Pevensie's small village, where they begin a night-time bombing raid. After the attack, the children are sent off to live with a distant relative - Professor Kirke, far from the battlefront of the German war. However, once the children find Narnia, they find themselves trapped in another war... and they are the heroes that the prophecies have foretold of. Though they don't want to go to war, they have a duty to Narnia and to each other that they must uphold.

The war in Narnia was absolutely amazing. I loved the different races of good & evil, the tactics used by them, and the massive scale on which it was fought. It was on par with the battles in Lord of the Rings... richly detailed, and very engrossing.

All in all, I’d give this movie 5 STARS. Re-watch value: HIGH

2006-02-08T11:23:00.001-08:00

Movie Review: Aeon Flux (Dec. 7th, 2005)

OMFG... What a piece of crap! Seriously, save your money! This movie has about 5 minutes of actual story and character development. The rest of the hour and a half is spent doing close-ups of Charlize Theron and bouncing back and forth between totally incoherent plot points. After about 90 minutes of sitting there in total confusion (and total lack of interest) you learn the final pieces that complete the 5 minute story line... but by this time, you really don't care anymore. You just want to go home and cry for wasting $25 on this rancid box office turd.

All in all, I'd give this movie 1 STAR. Re-watch Value: None

2006-02-08T11:23:00.000-08:00

Movie Review: Zathura (Dec. 7th, 2005)

I was very pleasantly surprised by this movie. I was expecting a "Jumanji in space" type of movie, but that wasn't it at all. Zathura has some really great dialog, gripping personal conflicts, and emotion to it. I was very surprised how truly interested I was with these characters... that's a rarity in most movies these days. Plus there was a little eye candy (the hottie sister) and a ton of great jokes and situational comedy thrown in for good measure. All around a great movie. I definitely recommend this to everyone... it's got something for all ages, and you'll leave the theater with a smile.

All in all, I'd give this movie 4 STARS. Re-watch Value: High

2006-02-08T11:22:00.000-08:00

Movie Review: Doom (Nov. 3rd, 2005)

For a movie based off of a game that came out 13 years ago, it wasn't half bad. I rather enjoyed it in fact – good, mind-numbing, blow stuff up fun! From watching the previews, I figured that since it looked so much like Doom 3, that it would be based on Doom 3, but NO... it was based off of Doom 1. So, the story that I got was not the story that I was expecting, which threw me off a little. But I digress.

I absolutely LOVED Reaper. Who is that guy? I swear I've seen him before somewhere, but I just can't place it. Anyhoo, he played his part terrifically. His cool, calm bravado in the face of death and destruction... his honor towards the end... all that, and he gets to beat the living crap out of the Rock! Well done Reaper, well done.

The only thing I really hated about the movie was The Rock's character. Way too much cussing - not for emphasis, but simply for dialog filler - that lowered this down to B-movie standards. Also, towards the end, The Rock basically turns evil zealot all of a sudden, with no real story/character development to back up why he was doing it. So his character and his attitude throughout the entire movie just didn't seem to fit. I'm so glad he got his ass beat down by Reaper in the end.

All in all, I'd give this movie 2.5 STARS. Re-watch Value: LOW

2006-02-08T11:21:00.000-08:00

Movie Review: Serenity (Oct. 6th, 2005)

I am a HUGE fan of Firefly, so I've been following every bit of news that I could after it was cancelled... hoping for a glimpse of rebirth. About 3 years ago now, I'd first heard that they were making Serenity, and since that time I've been patiently salivating in anticipation - like a dog who knows you're going to give him a yummy treat any minute now. After all this time, my moment finally arrived - Firefly was born anew as Serenity the motion picture. I was so excited that I could hardly contain myself. So I went to the theater, grabbed a soda pop and found a good seat. Afterwards, I was happy, I was sad, I was hoarse from shouting, I was misty eyed from crying, my cheeks hurt from laughing so much, and I was satisfied. Serenity was definitely worth the wait! In fact, I saw it twice opening weekend!

As a common practice, I rate movies solely on their own content & merit, not based off their ties to the TV shows/books/etc. that they were based on. Given that, I was very pleased that Serenity's story was done in a way that someone who's never seen Firefly could easily get up-to-speed on what's going on and follow the story pretty easily. But there were also plenty of subtle jokes and nuances that only we Firefly aficionados could see, which we will cherish forever.

This movie was an emotional rollercoaster (esp. to us Firefly aficionados). WARNING: SPOILERS BELOW!!!

When Shepard Book died, I didn't care all that much, but I was annoyed that we never got to learn what his ties were to the alliance.

When Wash died, the whole damn theater jumped out of their seats and screamed... we couldn't believe it! Wash was everyone's favorite character, hands-down., and to see him go out like that... OMG, I felt like a close friend or family member had died right before my eyes. Many of us cried.

Afterwards, all hell breaks loose... Zoe gets sliced open by the Reavers, Simon gets shot in the guts, Kaylee gets pumped full of darts (Were they poison or paralytic? Can't say for sure), Jayne gets shot several times, Mal gets the living crap beat out of him and gets stabbed thru the guts by the Operative's sword... all the while, I'm thinking HOLY $%^&ING SH$T... are they all going to die? Will this be the final flight of Serenity (which got torn to shreds during their crash landing). Have I waited all this time - 3 whole years - just to have my heart ripped out of my chest and thrown in a blender?

When Kaylee told us of her sexual frustrations, we all laughed so hard that we almost cried... "Captain, it's been a whole year since anything twixed my nethers that weren't run on batteries!" LOL!

And funniest of all was River. OMG that girl can make some funny faces. She can steal the scene with a simple gesture, sending the whole audience into riotous laughter. Also, her crazy-obliviousness to the panic around her, combined with her zany one-liners are hilarious. Like when they encounter the Reavers in the beginning of the movie... they all barely escape with their lives, and Simon runs to River (heart pounding an fearing the worst) and says "Are you ok?!" River looks at him, completely oblivious to his concern or the devastation around here, and says "I... swallowed a bug!" LOL.

The list goes on, but I'm tired of typing now... so I shall end my review here. Bottom line: GO WATCH SERENITY!

All in all, I'd give this movie 5 STARS. Re-watch Value: HIGH

2006-02-08T11:20:00.001-08:00

Movie Review: Transporter 2 (Sept. 12th, 2005)

Let's just start off with calling this movie what it is... a totally mindless, high-octane, action every moment, over-the-top, completely unbelievable, explosive action flick. That said, IT WAS EXCELLENT!

I loved the action choreography. For as unbelievable as the fighting scenes were, they were exceptionally well done. There are some very funny moments throughout the movie as well... like the opening scene where he pauses the fight so that he can take his jacket off "Wait... I just had this dry-cleaned..." he says. LOL

Finally, the villain is wicked cool (and I loved what he did to protect his serum... very clever indeed) and the chicks are smokin’ hot! I loved that Russian chick… awesome body, big guns, and an attitude that makes you appreciate naughtiness. The other chick - the kidnapped boy's Mom - is pretty damn hot too... can you say MILF? I can. Rrrrufff!

All in all, I'd give this movie 4 STARS. Re-watch Value: HIGH

2006-02-08T11:20:00.000-08:00

Movie Review: Lord of War (Sept. 30th, 2005)

The fact that this movie is based off a true story makes it all the more interesting. I thought Nicholas Cage did a phenomenal acting job. The story was gripping, gritty, yet unexpectedly funny at times, then very sad and bloody at others.

The opening sequence of watching a chunk of metal go thru the entire process of becoming a bullet and then being fired thru a young boy's head was amazing and really set the tone for the picture. This movie is definitely worth a watch.

All in all, I’d give this movie 4.5 STARS. Re-watch value: High

2006-02-08T11:19:00.000-08:00

Movie Review: The 40-Year-Old Virgin (August 30th, 2005)

Steve Carell is a rare treasure and a comic genius. Not only did he star in this wonderfully comedic and sweet-hearted movie, he also co-wrote the script. I loved the camaraderie and witty banter between Andy and his coworker buddies, the way he was just trying to fit in when they were talking about sex (“you know how when you grab a woman’s breast and it feels… like a bag of sand.”) – LOL!

His well meaning buddies wanted to help him “become a man,” forcing him to change his behavior and get out of his social shell, but at the same time, his buddies realized that their party-centric way of life isn’t the best thing either, so they learned a good life lesson from each other, helping Andy to find happiness and helping his buddies find balance and some stability in their lives. Not only was this movie a great comedy, but it’s also a great date movie – and I’m sure that any couples who watch this movie will end up re-enacting the final scene afterwards (wink, wink, nudge, nudge).

All in all, I'd give this movie 4 STARS. Re-watch Value: HIGH

2006-02-07T16:36:00.000-08:00

Movie Review: Sky High (August 5th, 2005)

Tremendously entertaining! This is the type of feel-good summer flick that I'd been hoping for. It's not raunchy, or shocking, or too dramatic, or all special effects with no story, etc. Instead, it caries a good pace, with good actors, has some good comedy, and is very entertaining to boot!

The Super Hero vs. Sidekick selection system was extremely original (and Bruce Campbell is always funny to watch). Also, I loved the different classes available to the students (like How to make a freeze ray from equipment that's lying around)... lol, I wish my old school had classes like that!

All in all, I'd give this movie 4 STARS. Re-watch Value: HIGH

2006-02-07T16:35:00.001-08:00

Movie Review: Herbie: Fully Loaded (July 21st, 2005)

This movie was definitely made for little kids, with no real value for anyone over 12. It was unfortunate because I was really expecting this movie to be cuter than it was. However, it was more disturbing than cute... raising a ton of questions that weren't ever answered. For example...

#1 - Is Herbie alive? Or he he just possessed by something? Either way, how was this made possible?
-- He gets nearly totaled several times, but the mechanics patch him back up to perfect health each time. Also, he's able to squirt car fluids all over people when he feels mischievous... and that doesn't seem to affect him at all. However, towards the end of the movie, he springs a leak during the big race and everyone says he might "die" if he keeps going because their shoddy quick-fix won't plug the leak for long. It just makes no sense.

#2 - During the opening credits, they show old footage of Herbie's golden days when he was a championship racer, then his eventual fall from stardom. Then when the movie opens, we find Herbie in a junk yard, waiting to be demolished. Furthermore, throughout the entire movie, it's as if nobody had ever seen/heard of Herbie before... even all the race car drivers! It's like Herbie never existed.
-- First of all, a car like this would NOT end up in the junkyard; it would be placed in a museum somewhere. Second of all, how is it that nobody has ever heard of Herbie?! The opening of the movie explicitly showed that damn near everyone knew Herbie and that he was the best race car of his time. It just makes no sense.

#3 - In the old movies, Herbie was just a normal car, aside from having intelligence and personality. However, in this new version, he can blink his headlights as if they were his eyes, he can make his front bumper frown/smile, he can open doors/hoods at will and use them like arms/legs.
-- Yet, nobody seems to notice these things throughout the entire movie. Herbie can be surrounded by 50 people and will be doing all sorts of things that can be considered "way of out ordinary" and yet nobody notices a thing. It just makes no sense.

So, my final verdict is this... if you're over the age of 12, don't bother seeing this movie. If your kids happen drag you to this movie, make sure you bring something to entertain yourself with.

All in all, I'd give this movie 1 STAR. Re-watch Value: NONE

2006-02-07T16:35:00.000-08:00

Movie Review: Wedding Crashers (July 20th, 2005)

One of the funniest comedies I’ve seen in a long time. Absolutely brilliant. From watching the previews, I knew this movie would be funny… however it greatly exceeded my expectations. It made me (and the rest of the audience) laugh so hard it almost hurt. Vince Vaughn and Owen Wilson have amazing chemistry together on-screen and the script writers did a fantastic job of giving the plenty of good material to work with.

There were times where I was laughing so hard that I almost fell out of my seat… there were also other times where I was so shocked/stunned that all I could do was put my hands over my mouth and stare, wide-eyed at what I was watching (like the part where she gets mad while tending to Vince’s football wound, or when Vince wakes up tied to the bed... these are the moments that just make you cringe, but laugh at the same time).

The 1st half of the movie was fast-paced and incredibly funny, but then the 2nd half slowed down considerably and went from comedy-driven to drama central. It was an unexpected shift and it seems a little odd and out of place… but it worked none-the-less. We were able to see a different side of the main characters and get to know them (and their new girlfriend’s wacky family). Towards the end, it had a solid mix of both drama and comedy and just felt good. I’m definitely going to see this movie again.

All in all, I’d give this movie 4.5 STARS. Re-watch Value: HIGH

2006-02-07T16:34:00.000-08:00

Movie Review: Fantastic Four (July 19th, 2005)

I really enjoyed this movie. It wasn’t nearly as cool as Spiderman or Batman Begins, but it was damn funny and the action was pretty cool. Johnny Storm was a riot… he had me laughing my ass off throughout the movie. The Thing was played extremely well… very angry and conflicted at first, but ultimately finds himself. Jessica Alba was HOT, plus she had her first ever on-screen nude scene… too bad she was invisible the whole time. It’s just not fair I tell you!

I didn’t like Mr. Fantastic all that much… he seemed too mild and boring. Also, I didn’t like Dr. Doom much either… he wasn’t nearly evil enough. He was too laid-back, nonchalant, and ultimately uninteresting. I love the actor who played him, but for this particular movie, I think someone else would have been better suited for the role.

All in all, I’d give this movie 3.5 STARS. Re-watch value: MEDIUM

2006-02-07T16:33:00.002-08:00

Movie Review: Mr. and Mrs. Smith (June 22nd, 2005)

For an over-the-top action movie, Mr. and Mrs. Smith was incredibly funny. I was totally not expecting to laugh as much as I did. The marriage counseling bit was side-splittingly entertaining, as was their race home to kill each other, or even their flirtations when they were trying to kill each other at the office and at the restaurant.

Right up until the end, I was totally grooving with this movie. However, the end battle was too over-the-top (even for this movie). Had they chosen a better ending, I think the rewatch value of this movie would be greatly improved. However, now knowing how cheesily it ends, it kind of ruins the rewatch value for me.

All in all, I'd give this movie 3.5 STARS. Re-watch value: LOW

2006-02-07T16:33:00.001-08:00

Movie Review: Land of the Dead (June 27th, 2005)

For a zombie horror/action flick, this movie covered all the necessary story elements, but then it did something interesting... it went above and beyond. I really liked how the semi-intelligent zombies were not just scavenging for their next meal, but instead were looking for a place to call their own... and make a new unlife for themselves.

Their ravaging of the city was not an act of self-indulgence, but rather an act of self-preservation. The humans considered them to be mindless undead and delighted in slaughtering and toying with them. All the undead wanted (those that were semi-intelligent that is) was to be left alone and not watch their brethren be tortured and humiliated by the humans.

All in all, I'd give this movie 3 STARS. Re-watch value: LOW

2006-02-07T16:33:00.000-08:00

Movie Review: War of the Worlds (July 5th, 2005)

Ok, first of all - No I didn't read the book. Second of all - I rate movies SOLELY based off of the movie's content. So if a movie doesn't really explain something, but it was covered in detail in the book, it doesn't matter... the movie is the movie, and that's what I'm rating.

That said, I think War of the Worlds was a complete waste of time and I WANT MY $$$ BACK - YOU HEAR ME TOM CRUISE?! YOU OWE ME $20!

There are sooooooo many things in this movie that just flat-out make no sense and aren't explained. For example...

1. The aliens have been watching Earth for eons and are jealous of our planet, so they want to wipe us out and make it there own.
-- Why wouldn't they just have colonized the planet when they came to it the 1st time (over a million years ago)?

2. The aliens vaporize every human that they see for the 1st half of the movie. Then, during the 2nd half, they basically "eat" the humans by sucking their blood dry. Then, they spray blood all over the landscape and this weird red vegetation begins to grow everywhere.
-- What the hell was that all about?

3. The aliens have impenetrable shields. However, when the aliens catch a cold, their shields become inoperable and the red vegetation dies.
-- What the hell was that all about?

4. And this is the big one... THE ALIENS ALL DIE BECAUSE THEY BREATHE OUR AIR, DRINK OUR WATER, AND EAT OUR FOOD.
-- This is beyond stupid. This reminded me of the movie "Signs" with Mel Gibson. That movie sucked too, for this very same reason.

How is it that a vastly intelligent alien race, who's mastered space travel, has incredibly advanced technology, etc... NOT SCAN THE PLANET TO SEE IF IT'S HARMFUL TO THEM?!!! I mean come on, that's the stupidest @#$%ing thing I've ever seen.

If there's an Ebola outbreak in South Africa, do we just run in there without any precautions and give aid to those afflicted? HELL NO! We send in the scientists with the germ-proof chem suits. Then they run their tests to see if it's safe to bring in the rest of the troops and supplies.

But apparently, according to War of the Worlds and Signs, these vastly superior aliens just throw caution to the wind and don't bother to run any tests to see if there's any harmful toxins, germs, etc. on Earth... No, they just spend Eons planning the invasion and then just charge right in!

Give me a @#$%ing break and give me my $$$ back! @#$% you Tom Cruise!

P.S.> I also think the father/son family issues/fighting was the stupidest sub-plot a movie like this could have.

All in all, I'd give this movie 1 STAR. Re-watch value: NONE

2006-02-07T16:32:00.001-08:00

Movie Review: Lords of Dogtown (June 22nd, 2005)

This was more of a docudrama than a movie, showing us how the pro-skater revolution got started, who the key players were, etc. From that standpoint, I really liked the movie. It was something of a history lesson, but at the same time it was really fun to watch. There was some cool skating, lots of interrelationship drama and a nice flow to the story.

The one thing that I really couldn’t stand, however, was Zypher (Heath Ledger’s character). His voice, accent, even his facial expressions… were all very annoying. I’m sure that they were trying to portray the real-life Zephyr in the movie, but it would’ve been better served to change him into a less annoying character in the movie. That aside, the movie was worth watching, but I doubt I’d watch it a 2nd time.

All in all, I'd give this movie 3 STARS. Re-watch value: LOW

2006-02-07T16:32:00.000-08:00

Movie Review: Batman Begins (June 22nd, 2005)

I have to admit something… before watching this movie, I wasn’t very excited about it, nor did I have any high expectations about it. I thought the previews were lame and I was dreading that it’d be as cheesy as the other Batman movies. However, after watching it, I’d have to say – OMFG WAS I WRONG!

Batman Begins is an absolutely phenomenal movie. The action sequences were 1st rate, the acting was sublime (esp. Liam Neeson), the story was dark instead of comical, and best of all – THE ENTIRE THING WAS BELIEVABLE! The way that Bruce Wayne transforms himself into Batman is totally 100% believable! I didn’t think that was possible with a super-hero movie.

In the last week, I have seen Batman Begins 3 times and I will definitely watch it again and again, just as I do with Spiderman 1 & 2... which, IMHO are right on par with Batman Begins in terms of overall movie awesomeness.

All in all, I'd give this movie 5 STARS. Re-watch value: HIGH

2006-02-07T16:31:00.000-08:00

Movie Review: Star Wars Episode 3 (May 26th, 2005)

Thank goodness, it's finally over! I've never been a huge fan of Star Wars for a number of reasons... first and foremost of which is because the dialog and acting are pretty damn terrible. Sure there's a ton of cutting-edge special effects, but that alone doesn't make a good movie. I also don't like the fact that all of the spaceships and laser beams MAKE NOISE IN THE VOID OF OUTER SPACE! They even demonstrate the Doppler shift when they're passing by the camera... very annoying and downright idiotic!

Plus I can't understand why the bad guys don't just NUKE the Jedi temple or at least SHOOT THEM WITH BULLETS... I'd like to see a Jedi try and use his Light Saber to deflect a hail of bullets from an M-16 or an Uzi! Anyhow, all things considered this movie was FAR BETTER than Episode 1 and & Episode 2... mainly because Jar-Jar doesn't open his *&^%$#@ mouth this time... not even a peep! It was a movie miracle! Last but not least... why is it that Yoda is hands-down the best actor in the entire movie? He's not even real! Ironic, don't you think?

All in all, I'd give this movie 2 STARS. Re-watch value: LOW

2006-02-07T16:28:00.000-08:00

Movie Review: Kingdom of Heaven (May 7th, 2005)

Watched Kingdom of Heaven yesterday... what a turd that was. For a full 2 1/2 hours, I suffered thru it... waiting, even hoping... that something cool and original would happen. But alas, it never did. The movie had some good actors (like Orlando Bloom - who I loved in LOTR and Pirates of the Caribbean), but the dialog and camera work in this movie were piss poor.

All of the characters had very few lines... so most of the time you just sat there watching their facial expressions (and checking your watch). The story had very little substance and felt more like an overextended montage than a chronicle of what was really happening.

It seems that Hollywood is capable of making great epics (like LOTR, Braveheart, Last Samurai, Gladiator, and the Matrix)... but then they run out of original ideas and make turds like Troy, Matrix 2-3, and sadly Kingdom of Heaven.

All in all, I'd give this movie 2 STARS. Re-watch value: NONE

2006-02-07T16:27:00.000-08:00

Recipe: Robert's Awesome Salsa

2 (14.5oz) cans Stewed Tomatoes (Mexican style preferably)
1 cup Onions (1/3 cup green onions and 2/3 cup yellow onions)
1 cup Cilantro (loosely packed)
0-1 cup Pickled Jalapeños (0=no heat, 1/3 cup=mild, 2/3 cup=medium, 1 cup=hot)
1 tsp Granulated Garlic
1 tbsp Lemon Juice (about 1/4 of a lemon) -- *Optional*
Salt to taste

Directions: Add the stewed tomatoes into a blender. Blend it until it's only a sauce - no chunks left. Then, pour 3/4 of it into a serving bowl, leaving the other 1/4 in the blender. Now, chop up the onions and cilantro, then add the rest of the ingredients to the blender. Blend until the ingredients are well mixed, but still chunky. Pour everything into the serving bowl and mix well with a spatula or spoon. Serve and enjoy!

2006-02-07T16:08:00.000-08:00

Well, I've decided I don't like my MSN Space anymore. MSN keeps making changes to the layout that I don't like, not to mention my general dissatisfaction with their GUI. So, I am moving my blog to Blogger.com and hoping to have a better user experience here.